Here I am, once again (hello, fellow Kelly Clarkson heads). Two years after I first reviewed my deepest, darkest Google search inquiries, finding myself at the end of another pandemic summer (woof!!!!), I’m ready for another deep dive.
Things have changed slightly since the last time I took part in this social exercise. For starters, it’s been close to two years since the COVID-19 vaccine rollout. And while having access to the vaccine hasn’t solved the pandemic, it has made summer socializing feel like less of a health risk for some, myself included.
As a result, I’m not scraping gum from the metaphorical undersides of my digital presence, trying to cobble together some significance from the past three months spent indoors. Yet, perhaps as a consequence of a busier social calendar, or adjusting to a new job in a new industry, or becoming the referee in an ongoing three-cat MMA fight, I’m still not quite sure where my summer went.
Once again, without further ado, here’s an abridged rundown of my non-work-related Google searches from Summer 2022, with brief explanations where I see fit:
May 28 - how to make vegetables last longer in the refrigerator
May 29 - is ringworm athlete's foot (our new kitten Anya came to us with ringworm, but don’t worry, it’s cured now!!)
May 30 - diy cat scratching post cardboard (you know, since we didn’t want to give her the real stuff with the ringworm)
May 31 - harry styles queer baiting
June 1 - can cats eat watermelon seeds
June 4 - carbon monoxide detector going off do we call fire department (yes, we called the fire department, and it was a natural gas detector that had malfunctioned before 9 a.m. :)! )
June 4 - hi gay (it’s a meme!)
June 5 - drag race who should have won
June 5 - how to store baby carrots in the fridge (apparently I forgot any information I gleaned in that previous Google search)
June 6 - liberal quebec tourist attractions (lol)
June 6 - rupaul vote sign
June 6 - retinol eyebrow wax
June 6 - do i need a natural gas detector (our complex replaced the aforementioned faulty natural gas detector with a smoke and CO detector, and now I fear that we’ll die from a real but undetected natural gas leak)
June 7 - go piss girl (also a meme!!)
June 7 - why do cats cover their face when they sleep
June 7 - should i take lactaid
June 7 - toronto to montreal driving
June 8 - can cats eat broccoli
June 12 - stanford business school graduation 2022 ( I love supporting my friends!!)
June 12 - what happens if airbnb host changes address without telling you (you can get a refund, apparently)
June 13 - does it cost more to use my credit card in canada? (it does!)
June 14 - the day one direction broke up
June 17 - basic french phrases (turns out Quebec loves their French!!)
June 18 - men in the hat sleep paralysis
June 18 - enneagram 6
June 23 - how to pronounce "tove lo" (another Drag Race-related search)
June 24 - texas maternal mortality rate
June 24 - backdoor lover lyrics
June 25 - i wish you well in hell
June 26 - watch life size movie (why can’t I find this movie anywhere??)
June 26 - which car rental membership is best
June 29 - wirecutter best air purifier pets
July 2 - health at every size doctor near me
July 2 - how many weeks until september 21
July 6 - kaitlin armstrong before (lol)
July 6 - miles teller top gun jet fuel
July 7 - john mccain wife cheated
July 7 - josie and the pussycats join the military
July 9 - Samson Occom
July 13 - i just quit my job beyonce
July 15 - lizzo break up twice sample (it’s a good sample!)
July 17 - gender reveal betting pool
July 20 - ba5 variant masks outdoors (things were getting alarming again, can you blame me!)
July 23 - the shame makenna goodman (this book is actually really good and I was looking for other reviews)
July 27 - cheap contacts online
July 27 - axis 011 vs 010 (if anyone can actually explain this to me, you have my attention)
July 31 - baja blast mountain dew
August 3 - pain where tongue connects to mouth
August 3 - 2020 first presidential debate
August 3 - Can a woman have a moment!!! (never forget <3)
August 4 - countries with universal healthcare
August 4 - is europe racist (lol)
August 4 - covid pandemic ignored cdc
August 4 - big tex on fire
August 7 - move i'm gay (once again, another meme!!!)
August 11 - how long are cats pregnant
August 11 - how long are elephants pregnant
August 11 - how long do elephants live
August 14 - coolest bottles of rose (I went with Wolffer Estate Summer In A Bottle, if you’re interested)
August 15 - miss congeniality september 11
August 17 - demi 29
August 17 - wilmer lindsay lohan
August 18 - why am i allergic to cats but not my own
August 18 - quvenzhané wallis chrissy teigen (remember this??)
August 18 - quiet quitting (can’t believe you people made me look up such a nonsense phrase)
August 18 - 1 million philippine pesos to dollars (also a Drag Race-related search)
August 18 - bakla tagalog
August 19 - seriously cracked elbows (they’re getting better, thanks for asking!!)
August 20 - lily tomlin murders in the building (sorry to this actress who is not Lily Tomlin)
August 22 - wilmer valderrama grooming demi (see previous searches “demi 29” and “wilmer lindsay lohan) lol)
August 22 - can cats have oat milk (cats can have a lot of things, it turns out!)
August 23 - lena wilson writer (wow remember that whole thing)
August 25 - elizabeth holmes autographed flag
August 25 - crossbody bags for fat bodies (if you have recs I am all ears)
August 26 - schizophrenia thinking you are jesus (also wow remember that whole thing)
August 27 - best celebrity memoirs of 2021
August 27 - what to do with a puzzle once completed
Tabarnak don’t move to Quebec. Francois Legault is gunna be re-elected. And you’ll have to do a 4th tax return unlike the rest of Canada, it’s such a pain.