Get Elon Musk the Fuck Out of Here

Whatever your views on Palestine and Israel, surely we can all agree that this gibbering fool belongs as far away as possible from this conflict.

Government Press Office of Israel/Anadolu via Getty Images

We are living through a time of great polarization, particularly where Israel and Palestine are concerned. It can be hard to forge a consensus and coalesce around the issues that bring us all together, no matter where we stand.

As someone who has spent the last several weeks strongly advocating for controversial and alienating positions like “apartheid and occupation are bad” and “killing thousands of children from the sky is wrong,” I now want to do my part to reach across the divide. So today, I am unveiling a new policy position that everyone can support, regardless of their stance on broader questions.

That position is:

Whatever we may think is needed in Palestine and Israel right now—for instance, whether we correctly think that a permanent ceasefire is the only humane solution, or whether we wrongly and despicably think that Israel’s wanton slaughter in Gaza should be allowed to resume—what we can all agree is NOT needed is the presence of noted sociopath and dumbass Elon Musk.

Simple enough! Elon Musk is, objectively speaking, one of the worst and most catastrophically stupid people in world history. Every time he decides to train his weird little racist eyes on a situation, that situation almost immediately deteriorates by like 100000000 percent. He’s not even a bull in a china shop. He’s the Running of the Bulls in a china shop.

So the absolute last place you want Elon Musk is in the middle of the Israel-Palestine conflict. And yet! Elon Musk has now inserted himself into the middle of the Israel-Palestine conflict, and, surprise surprise, he is making things worse.