FOWL HYSTERIA 2025: THE WINNER
It's our closest, roughest, toughest championship EVER.
All great things must come to an end, including Fowl Hysteria. It’s been a wild, thrilling ride, but now we’re here to name a champion.
32 birds entered the arena a few weeks ago. Only two remain. And the final round of Fowl Hysteria 2025 was, without a doubt, the most intense and dramatic championship match we have ever seen.
So let’s get into it.
Our two finalists, the great blue heron and the American kestrel, are both birds that inspire devotion and fierce loyalty. Don’t believe us? Here are just some of the comments from readers about the final:
—I understand "nature is violence" and all that, but a bird that is primarily known for its fishing acumen resorting to unprovoked bird-on-bird violence is a big negative for me here.
—Ridiculous to diss blue herons for killing other birds while writing about how lethal kestrels are. They are wonderful to watch in wetlands and ponds.
—Kestrels are antifa. AHAB.
Wowza. You do not play around when it comes to defending your faves. And the voting reflected this partisan split. Much like our country, Discourse Blog was divided.
But, as we said last week, there can only be one winner of Fowl Hysteria. And it’s time to unveil that winner now.
Drumroll please….
THE WINNER IS……..
IT’S A TIE!!!!!!!!!!!! THEY BOTH WIN!!!!!!!
Yeah, so remember when we said there could only be one winner? Well…read it and WEEP with joy.
The numbers do not lie. IT IS A TIE.
This is the most shocked anyone has been to announce a tie since Ingrid Bergman at the 1969 Oscars.
Ingrid was floored that Katharine Hepburn and Barbra Streisand had both won Best Actress, and we are floored that the heron and the kestrel have both won Fowl Hysteria 2025.
And really, isn’t a tie SO cool??? Two incredible birds, each with passionate stan armies behind them, each with so much grit and grace, each a credit to the marvels of this planet we live on, and now each winners of the most coveted bird-themed award in world history. What a twist!!!
As ever, Caitlin had the perfect reaction.
Beautiful is right.
Let’s salute our TWO champions, the great blue heron and the American kestrel.
Marvelous, simply marvelous.
And let’s salute you, the readers of Discourse Blog, for making this without question the greatest Fowl Hysteria of all time.
See you in 2026.
A reminder: you can check out our complete Bird of the Week list here, and get in touch with your bird suggestions at hello@discourseblog.com.
Wow!!! Congratulations to all the winners, and also all the losers, and also every bird
The lying news media does it again.
Love both birds but we all know the real outcome here.
The d.blog bylaws should've designated a tiebreaking parliamentarian-type individual for this exact scenario (presumably a bird pecking at the photos). Good thing it's not called Democracy.Blog!