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Nothing Can Prepare You for the Horrors of the Smith College Library Rap Video

RIP hip hop, you had a good run.

screenshot / YouTube

When Substackaroo Bari Weiss championed former Smith College Librarian Jodi Shaw as a victim of “something morally grotesque […] swallowing liberal America” in a characteristically overwrought and underedited blog this past February, I thought to myself “wow, this all sure seems pretty stupid!” and then promptly went back to not giving a shit about any of it. Some lady wants to quit her job because The Man (that is, her employers) said she shouldn’t do a rap about a college library? Who cares. None of my business, despite Bari’s grandiose efforts to make it so. Aside from a morbid curiosity about the illicit rap in question, I simply could not muster up a single iota of giveafuckattude, no matter Bari’s proclamation that “the hour is very late. It calls for courage.” The hour may indeed be late, but all it really calls for is a goddamned nap.

Well, the sleeper has awakened, because this week Shaw posted her long-promised debut single which somehow flew well under the radar of just about everyone. That’s a shame, because as you’re about to see, The Smith College Library Rap is an incredible piece of art. It’s got everything; step-by-step instructions for checking out books; non-sequitur verses about her tragic victimhood (no mention of the $200,000 payment she allegedly demanded to end her lawsuit over, again, not being allowed to rap); and a special green-screen guest appearance by “white Holocaust” believer Conceptual James.

Buckle up, folks. This way lies madness.

Well my name is Rafi and I’m here to say // this is the soundtrack to hell each and ev-er-y day!