Skip to contents
Fever Swamp

Which Is Funnier: Trump Getting COVID or Bolsonaro Getting Hiccups?

This is a tough one.

A side by side image of Donald Trump and Jair Bolsonaro
Donald Trump/Brazilian Government

As we all know, Donald Trump getting COVID was the funniest thing that happened in 2020. But here’s the question: is Trump getting COVID funnier than Brazilian president and all-time maniac Jair Bolsonaro being hospitalized for getting hiccups for 10 days straight?

From The Guardian:

The Brazilian president Jair Bolsonaro has been admitted to hospital complaining of abdominal pain after being struck down by an unremitting bout of the hiccups which has lasted for more than 10 days.

Bolsonaro, 66, was reportedly taken to military hospital in the capital Brasília at about 4am on Wednesday, with one prominent Brazilian journalist claiming the president was suffering from a bowel obstruction.

In a brief statement, the presidency said Bolsonaro was in good spirits and doing well but would remain under observation for up to 48 hours. Tests were being carried out to investigate what was causing the hiccups.

“Tests were being carried out to investigate what was causing the hiccups.” Chef’s kiss.

I thought there would never be anything more hilarious than Trump getting COVID. What a wild ride that was—the steroid-addled rants, the weird-ass doctor who kept lying for him, the idle conversations about whether he was going to, y’know. He was so brain-damaged and so worthy of being struck down by the virus he’d spent a year laughing off that it was a beautiful thing to watch.

But it may be the case that seeing Bolsonaro—an equally heinous far-right lunatic who had already graced the world with some immortal pictures of himself looking possibly more unhealthy than any human being has ever looked—come up against the power of Big Hiccup is even funnier than seeing Trump talk about how great it is to take every drug ever made.

This is from CNN:

Bolsonaro has been complaining for more than a week of hiccups, saying it was causing him difficulties when speaking in public. On Tuesday night he addressed the issue when talking to supporters. “Guys, I’m voiceless, guys. If I start talking too much, the hiccup bout comes back. The hiccup is back,” he said. During a social media event last Thursday, the president said that he had had hiccups “for over a week” at that point. “I may not be able to express myself properly on this live,” he said.

The president of Brazil telling his followers that he can’t talk because the hiccups won’t ever go away. I mean….

OK you tell me: which is funnier? Trump getting COVID or Bolsonaro getting hiccups? Answers in the comments please.

Update, 4:43 p.m. ET: OK Bolsonaro is bringing the big guns…