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Man, What the Hell?

Man, What The Hell? Who Nose? Edition

Plus dicks, Diamonds, and Dictators

Politics is hardly a place for subtlety and nuance, but even by that admittedly low bar, there is such a thing as excessive overkill when it comes to political messaging.

Just look at Georgia Republican Sen. David Perdue’s recent (and since discontinued) Facebook ad attacking Democratic opponent Jon Ossoff, who — if the ad’s wholly liminal messaging isn’t enough of a clue for you — is Jewish.

It’s unclear whether “Beware ✡️💵” is a winning message for Perdue, although most polls show Ossoff significantly behind in the race. Still, however blatant the ad’s insinuation may have been in and of itself, some eagle-eyed political observers noticed something a little…off about Perdue’s graphic design choice.

Either Ossoff is a little Italian puppet who just told a lie, or…. 👃👃👃👃👃

Of course, Perdue’s campaign denied any intentional anti-Semitism, blaming an “outside vendor” who “distorted the picture” by misusing a photo editing layer. Ossoff, for his part, didn’t buy the excuse, tweeting that the involuntary rhinoplasty constituted “the oldest, most obvious, least original anti-Semitic trope in history,” and that “literally no one believes your excuses.”

One of two things has happened here:

1) The elongated proboscis was a sincere mistake, leaving the ad juuuuuuust anti-Semitic enough to fly under America’s glitchy civility radar, while still making its (((message))) plenty clear.


2) Someone at some level of the campaign evidently thought that “Jews are coming to buy Dixie” was good, but not great, and decided to kick things up a notch with a decidedly Der Sturmer-esque tweak.

Either way, it’s all just a bit…much, right? Heavy-handed, uncreative overkill. Anti-Semitism has no place in political ads at all, of course, my god, but this isn’t just bad, it’s lazy. As you’ll see, there’s been lots of that going around this week. Not a great diagnosis for the body politic these days, but boy does it make you stop and say “Man, what the hell?”

All that glitters is not mold

I wish I loved anything as much as Brazilian president and genuine fascist Jair Bolsonaro seems to enjoy testing positive for the coronavirus. After not one but two confirmed infection tests this month, Bolsonaro jokingly whined that “after 20 days indoors, I have other problems. I have mold in my lungs” during a livestream on Thursday — the same day his wife, Michelle, also tested positive for the virus.

While I am neither a doctor nor an interior designer, I suspect that if you start sprouting lung mold after less than three weeks at home you should probably dust your shelves and shit once in a while.

Weird flex, but okay

This guy could be the GOP congressman from Texas’ 26th district between 1985 and 2003.

A’thank you.

Shine on you crazy Diamond

Here is a completely serious statement from completely serious Pennsylvania Republican congressman Russ Diamond, who has courageously chosen to stand up and defend the honor of the “unmasked community,” which is apparently a real thing he really believes exists.

Is this a truly dogshit stupid statement to release, in and of itself? Boy is it! But it’s so much worse when you learn that Rep. Diamond was actually mocking Pennsylvania Secretary of Health Dr. Rachel Levine, who is transgender, by simply copy-pasting her recent speech warning of rising hate crimes against the queer community, but replacing her use of “LGBTQ” with the (entirely fictional) “unmasked community.”

A bigot, and an asshole? Why I never!

Speaking of masks…

Can we just not-zi?

Item: “Holocaust Face Masks,” an online store selling face coverings featuring prints of Jews being marched into Auschwitz, Nazis holding children at gunpoint, and — for some inexplicable reason — an airplane hitting the World Trade Center.

The site explains:

Our goal here is to provide a reminder of what can happen when millions of people follow seemingly innocent ‘orders’ and ‘rules’.  In the times of the holocaust people may not have had such a recent example of evil to keep them vigilant and weary of evil to come.  We do.


Item: The Minnesota Republican Party was forced to make a hasty correction after an image went up on the Wabasha County Republican Facebook page comparing wearing a mask during the coronavirus pandemic with Nazis forcing Jews to wear yellow stars during the Holocaust.

Shortly after the image was shared on the (since deleted) Facebook page, state GOP chair Jennifer Carnahan claimed that local officials “believe this was a hack” except…whoops, this just in: Less than 24 dril-infused hours later, the party was forced to admit that the Nazi comparison wasn’t so much a “hack” as it was the work of a Wabasha County GOP board member. Whoopsie!

Item: Oh, did you think I was done with the MNGOP? I regret to inform you that only days after all this went down, the endorsed candidate for Minnesota’s 6A house district posted perhaps an even worse — if somewhat confusing — Holocaust meme comparing government overreach with an uncensored image of a mass grave…or something? It’s honestly not a very good meme in terms of understandability alone, which is probably why Julie Buria, the Republican candidate who posted the picture, took it down shortly thereafter.

Item: U.S. Ambassador to the Netherlands Pete Hoekstra took a nice, relaxing walk in Ysselsteyn cemetery this week, where he evidently caught feelings for the 80-something German WW1 soldiers buried there… alongside more than 30 thousand WW2 Germans — commonly referred to as fucking Nazis — planted under his feet.

Item: I’m…I’m just gonna leave this one right here… uh, enjoy?

First as tragedy, then as farts

Credit where credit is due: Pants truly are the fart mask of the ass.

And finally

There’s really only one way to head into the weekend, and that’s by going…

Did anything make you say “Man, what the hell?” this week? Perhaps out loud to a roommate, loved one, or disinterested household pet/plant? Misery loves company, so share your personal what the hells in the comments below!

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(pic via Jerry Weintraub Productions, Section Eight Productions, Village Roadshow Pictures, Warner Bros. Pictures – the nose plays)